In case you were stunned and deflowered by my title, (I hope you weren't deflowered, but in case you were) be it known that I am reading and preparing a study guide for William Faulkner's Absalom, Absalom!

Usually, despite my limited attention span and recently increased love for comics, I can whiz through a book pretty easily. The biggest threat to my reading span is other books, which look more interesting than whatever I'm reading at the moment. It goes back to when my sister told me her ice cream tasted better than mine. I've never been satisfied since.

But this book... okay, I can't even read one sentence before I start spacing out. I can't get through paragraphs. I reach the end of the page and realize I have no idea what's happened. I might be able to go through the whole book forcing myself to look at each page for a few minutes, but I doubt I'll be able to ever say that I actually read it. I mean, you have to at least comprehend the words on the page to read something. Like, you have to be able to follow a sentence with your eyes.

This study guide should be interesting.